Is Therapy Pointless?

I had therapy today. I get myself all worked up into a frenzy starting about a week before therapy appointments, only to get into the actual session and not be able to talk to my therapist about anything of importance. Why do I do this? I really wanted to tell him how I have been feeling. I needed to, but I couldn’t. Whatever is blocking me from expressing myself verbally took a seat right there with me and stole my words. We had a more “philosophical” discussion instead. I’m left feeling frustrated and more hopeless than before I went in. I don’t even have the words to express my feelings here. What’s the point?

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7 thoughts on “Is Therapy Pointless?

  1. Honestly this is by far the most difficult wall to overcome when you start seeing or even have been seeing a therapist. Talk therapy takes a lot of trust and it doesn’t always work out every session. If you keep having a problem, try asking your therapist to recommend another therapist, you won’t hurt their feelings!

    • I don’t trust easily. Today was session #8. I think he’s still trying to figure me out; and unfortunately, I don’t think I’ve given him much to go on. I keep hoping it will get easier to talk to him because there really aren’t many options in my community for people without insurance or a way to pay for treatment. I’m at a loss for words right now, but thank you for your comment.

  2. I agree with Doctor Zulak. Don’t give up. And if you can, give yourself credit for showing up. Even if you sat through the whole session and didn’t say a thing, you still showed up. Remember that scene in Good Will Hunting when the therapist (played by Robin Williams) almost falls asleep they go so long without talking? Thanks for sharing your experience. You’re not alone. ❤

  3. So, I’m making my way through your “My Story” posts and I am interrupting that reading to come over hear and ask you: have you ever thought about printing out those posts and sharing them – even just one of them – with your therapist? Maybe you’ve already shared all that background with your therapist. But if you haven’t, it could be a way to free you up from having to converse. You could just read. And chances are, you’ll start talking about something before you finish reading any one of the posts. Just an idea…

    • I had actually hoped to share this blog with my therapist at some point. I’m finding myself reluctant to do so, though. We’ve discussed some of the aspects of my story, but not in great detail. On our very first visit, I kind of blurted out a lot of what had happened in my life but with emotional detachment (his observation). I think my struggle to remain emotionally detached is what is causing the suicidal thoughts to resurface. And my fear of medicine and being hospitalized is preventing me from sharing these suicidal urges with him. It’s like a vicious cycle. And to answer my own question, I think therapy most certainly will be pointless unless I can make myself be honest with him about how I’m feeling.

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