Numb

Physically, I’ve not felt well for the past couple of days. Headaches, dizziness, light-headed, low body temperature (96.4°) — just a general feeling of malaise and tiredness. Before dinner last night, the headache turned into a full-blown migraine. Dinner helped some, but afterward I became so dizzy and light-headed that I saw stars, exactly like in the cartoons. It felt like the blood drained from my head, and I thought I might pass out. Today hasn’t been much better. I woke up with a headache and dizziness again. I can’t get warm even though I’m constantly under a blanket. My hands and feet are cold as ice, yet the temperature in the house is the usual 70°. I should have run garbage to the dump and run to the store for a few groceries, but dizziness and driving aren’t a good mix. I figured it was better to be safe than sorry.

Emotionally, I feel numb. I would still rank the depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts higher than my normal; but my emotions (as well as the voices) feel blunted, distant. I’ll take it. I needed a break.

I must have started half a dozen or more posts over the past couple of weeks, but none expressed exactly how I’ve been feeling lately. Neither does this one. I blame the headaches. I think I need to go lie down for a bit… again….

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